This morning.

My dad: SY-ah... the rubbish ah.... you must keep clean!

Me: wtf
[takes a moment to think it over]
he must mean that I need to sort out the recycling in my rubbish bin in my room more closely??? but ??? i just had a period, how am i supposed to keep it clean??? isn't the nature of rubbish that it's just... not clean??
[decides to not engage]

A few minutes later:

My dad: hey, look at this lizard skeleton I found in the cabinet! [shows it off]

[I'm still too tired so it doesn't occur to me to take a picture even though it IS pretty cool]

My dad: I'm going to rehydrate it! [and yes it is exactly the tone of Steve Irwin's "ah'm gonna wrassle it!" here]

Me: [brain fritzes]